What's a Charismatic Leader to Do?
When the leader the Church always wanted is no longer the leader the Church needs most.
Last week, a major voice within the Christian deconstruction community became the latest in the ever-growing list of Christian organizations to be rocked by a third-party investigation revealing controlling behavior, abuses of power, and overall concerning misconduct from the org’s front man, Tim Whitaker.
Much like the evangelical leaders he spent several years publicly denouncing and distancing himself from, Tim rose to internet popularity and a place of spiritual leadership through very similar means: he’s charismatic, engaging, passionate, and has a presence that demands attention. Tim is a gifted communicator and a man with a vision. He has proven himself equally capable of drawing a crowd as he is able to stir that crowd up with enthusiasm toward his cause. Aside from the unorthodox theology, Tim Whitaker is the kind of leader most evangelical church plants would “die to self” for. Tim Whitaker is the kind of leader the evangelical church has always taught us it needs most.
But as similar and even worse investigations continue to plague the church at large by revealing more and more leaders to be controlling, unhealthy, abusive and harmful, more and more folks are coming around to the idea that this staple, charismatic, booming presence that knows how to draw a crowd may not be the best type of leader we should all be ready and willing to submit to.
Folks are yearning for a different kind of leadership. For some, “different” means looking for more diverse leadership with more women or BIPOC individuals on their boards or elder teams. For others, it means looking explicitly for female lead pastors or clergy belonging to the LGBTQ+ community. For others like me, shared mutuality and less hierarchy are the ideal leadership styles we long for. And so, in the midst of all these changing expectations, wants, and hopes for church leadership, it demands to be asked: is there still a place for the charismatic, center-stage leader in the church today?
What’s a visionary to do if their primary gifts are those that have, historically, launched them to the front of the crowd but now only seem to launch others toward abusive and toxic behavior? Those whose gender, skin color, and/or skill sets have long afforded them privileges within the church system, but now only seem to offer them predetermined judgements or pause, should they now forever be relegated to the margins of the spaces they once dominated?
I’ve actually sat with such questions a lot. As someone who has long been affirmed in very similar skill-sets, my own desire to switch to a shared and non-hierarchical leadership strategy presented a long season of wrestling for me regarding what to do with these gifts that I had always been told were best suited for a church model I no longer wanted. And that’s the thing. The more I distanced myself from traditional church models and the more I allowed my giftings and abilities to find a natural rhythm within the community we were forming, the more obvious it became:
My gifts were never the problem; the way I was being told to utilize them was. The ways in which the institution that surrounded me sought to form and shape such gifts were mutilating and disfiguring them and their purpose beyond recognition.
I didn’t need to abandon or hide my charisma, my drive, my vision, nor any of my other “standard leadership” qualities, I simply needed to recalibrate them. I needed to shift their settings from control, ego, self, and exploitation to welcome, service, and communal flourishing. I had to go from seeing these gifts as a guaranteed assurance of a certain platform or privileged position and instead begin to see them for what they truly were: gifts designed to be shared with and utilized for the benefit of a whole community.
The internal belief that being charismatic and engaging automatically qualifies you to be a leader is what must first be unlearned. Ask any woman with such traits; we know what it means to utilize them for the benefit of a community without necessarily needing to be at the head of it.
Yes, this is the current work of any charismatic want-to-be-leader. It is to begin to divorce their gifts, personality, and traits from their presumed assumption of getting to be “the one in charge.” One must learn what it means to be charismatic without needing to be at the helm, what it means to be engaging with others without talking over them or for them, and what it means to be magnetic without allowing that attraction toward you to pull away from everyone else around you.
Are you as desperate to see the comforting compassion of Carl be uplifted as much as your own ability to teach?
Are you as eager to see the prophetic voice and discernment of Julie be amplified as much as your visionary talents?
Are you as motivated to find a place within your gathering for the lived and hard-fought-for wisdom of Alice as you are a place for your exegetical prowess?
Your magnetic traits are not the enemy. They are simply no longer the center. They are being relegated back to where they have always belonged— in the accompaniment of the chorus that is the many other gifts, qualities, and characteristics of others that are necessary for the body of Christ to flourish.
What if your magnetism was always meant to help draw out other people’s giftedness?
What if your charisma was a light never meant to be reserved for a solo act?
What if your vision, your charm, your ability to gather, attract, and enchant were all just meant to serve as the open door to a home filled with others whose strengths and abilities are as necessary to helping people feel loved and cared for as yours are to get them through the threshold?
One's gifts are not what make one a leader. One’s ability to see, celebrate, and help bring out the gifts of others-- that’s a leader. So those with charisma, passion, and charm shouldn’t necessarily be seen as leaders because these qualities are most important or necessary to the Body at large. No, they should only be seen as leaders if they can utilize such charisma, passion, and charm for the uplifting, centering, and drawing out of others their own versions of flourishing.
And in truth, I think there are a great many folks who would currently identify themselves as a “charismatic leader”, but if forced to rethink their skill sets from this standpoint would quickly find that their gifts are simply being in control, being the center of attention, and always having the loudest voice.
Are you actually engaging? Or are you just used to being the voice everyone in the room is conditioned to listen to?
Do you actually possess a Christ-like vision? Or are your visionary capabilities better suited for marketplace business ventures and entrepreneurial pursuits? Did you always assume those were the same? Probably time to unpack that….
Were you actually born to be a leader? Or have you only ever known an existence that consistently centers you because of your gender, skin color, and/or personality?
The more you seek to live out your “gifts” in a communal rather than self-involved manner, the more you will begin to find the answers to such uncomfortable yet necessary questions. And I believe being forced to explore such gifts in a communal rather than self-involved manner is the only way to answer these questions.
What is your charm without power? Your passion without control? Your magnetism without a platform? Are you capable of being charismatic about others getting the chance to lead too? Because that’s the type of “charismatic leader” the church needs most right now.